Eulogy for Joseph Christian Cruz

eulogy for jay
By Gary Devilles

There are no words to soothe our grief in this untimely passing of our dear friend Jay, and that is why we only speak of metaphors and similes not only to understand what ails us but more importantly to share with you tonight a grace that emanates from being with him no matter how brief that is. We borrow from a popular song that goes:

Like a comet blazing across the evening sky
Like a rainbow fading in the twinkling of an eye
Shiny and sparkly and splendidly bright
Here one day, gone one night

Like the loss of sunlight on a cloudy afternoon
Like a castle built upon a sandy beach
Like a perfect flower that is just beyond your reach
Born to amuse, to inspire, to delight

Like a sunset dying with the rising of the moon
Gone too soon

This song aptly describes our feelings for Jay, an awareness of the beauty of nature that is all fleeting. The poignancy of such moments drives us not to desire more but rather to take on an attitude to grasp the present, tap its potential and enrich our lives. If there is one thing we all know from Jay, it is this passion for everything that he does, whether talking to a friend on profound questions about life, or even engaging us in a physical game like basketball, Jay would always be in his best condition, inspiring and prodding us to do more.

We remember Jay during grade school, he was already reckoned as a good basketball player. But he joined another game, group games, a form of game that any kid at that time would look down upon. But Jay made the game highly competitive and gradually put some respectability to those group games. There were times when Jay would be scolded by Ms. Militar, our former teacher then, for being hot-tempered, but we all know, that it was just Jay being himself, passionate to a fault, determined to win. There was a quote written on the walls of our classroom then, "whoever you are, be the best that you can be." We never pay attention to this adage but Jay lived it until his last.

Believe it or not, Jay tried acting in high school. He was a given role and a very dramatic scene where he would be killed accidentally by the mean and oppressive Chinese businessman. Some of us his former classmates who are here today remember the roles we essayed in that stage play and we were all impressed by him and this somehow led us to believe that Jay can do anything, from sports to theatre to academics. It is not surprising, that after high school, he would take up engineering in UP and eventually raise a loveable family. Jay from time to time, would join us for a gathering, but in the end, he would always leave early, excuse himself, and tell us of his responsibilities at home. Jay was always the family man and we all love him for this.

And so today, that we surely miss him, we commemorate his deeds and honor his memory. For Jay you are the sunset dying but we redeem ourselves with the rising moon, a promise of an eventual gathering. As the poet TS Eliot says, all shall be well and all manner of thing shall be well when the tongues of flames are in-folded into the crowned knot of fire and the fire and the rose are one. Fare well, Jay.